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celerywench: KNOCK KNOCKintomorning: Who's there?meiface: That would be the Philadelphia Flyers.God, I have been trying to make this post forever but I keep getting overwhelmed with feelings or distracted by vids so bear with me here - there might be a lot of words and words are hard.
I was introduced to the Flyers through
2naonh3_cl2 because they are her forever team. I have absolutely no ties to or particular interest in Philly but because she loved them, I ended up watching their games and slowly becoming invested in them. You know what really helped? Round 1 against the Penguins. Fuck yeah that was entertaining and that was all I initially required.It was all a slippery slope from there.
And now I am the proud owner of this shirt:
Ugh, Claude Giroux, so fly. (His song has either Like a G6 or else I'm going to just start singing, "Gee gee gee gee baby baby baby.")
So I'm going to start with the super shippy vid just to convince all you non-hockey people to give this a shot, yes, maybe? If you watch no other vid in this post, watch this one:
&The Brioux Family;
Married marrieds are super married. With kids. Three kids and two dogs. ♥
Claude has since moved out, replaced by rookie Sean Couturier (Danny, like me, apparently likes them young...), but the married marriedness continues.
♥ Here is a Danny/Claude primer!
♥ Here is another one!
♥ Here is the Danny/Claude tag on AO3 (or my Pinboard tags)
♥ Another video about them
♥ The NHL and media ship them
I love them. :D And they love each other. ♥
So now do you maybe care enough to read the rest of my post? Maybe? You should!
The Philadelphia Flyers are the Broad Street Bullies, nicknamed as such thanks to epic fights like the one that caused the NHL to institute a rule about players leaving the bench to brawl and the one that made the Soviet team quit the game halfway through.
Yeah, so they’re kind of assholes on the ice. It’s a thing.
&Claude Giroux; (#28)
This primer could have been 90% how much I love G and 10% how much I love everyone else, but I felt like that would misrepresent how many feelings I have for everyone else. It's just that G is, um, by far my favorite. (Like, right behind Jeff Skinner right now. God. What is shame? At least G's not a twelve-year-old, right? Stop judging.)
G is beastly at hockey. I thought I'd put that out there first. He's easily, to me, one of the best players in the world right now and you'll hear lots of other people say that (including Flyers' coach Laviolette). He's a forward and despite his size and penchant for being a skill player (5'11" i.e. tiny for hockey), not at all afraid to be aggressive and physical.
Take, for instance, Game 6 of the Philly-Pittsburgh series, where G laid a huge hit on Sidney Crosby in the first 4 secs, then scored a goal 20 secs later:
(Or the "fight" between him and Crosby in Game 3.)
There's a way to set the tone of the game. He got made the third A for the Flyers when their captain Chris Pronger (more on him later) was knocked out with a concussion in late October 2011 (and is still out :| it’s super sad) and he’s been an amazing leader on the ice.
Watch his Top 10 moments from this past season:
And here’s moment that makes all hockey fans wet, according to every hockey site ever: G masterfully (I'm sure I've seen this description somewhere) playing keep away with the puck despite being bombarded by Bruins players on all sides.
Hockey aside, uh, I could talk about how he, you know, has arms that make me a little weak in the knees. And looks super hot in blue:
Although he likes wearing a lot of pink and lavender:
And once he made a tragic life decision to go blond and hang out with Brad Marchand:
But usually his hair is fabulous:
One important thing to know about G: he’s a classy motherfucker and he supports You Can Play.
"As players, we are in a fortunate position to help, to get together and lend our support. We want to help. Even though time for us to do things is tough at points during the season, there is never a question of wanting to be involved with something like this." --Claude Giroux, Unscripted
Other things about G: When he was drafted, Bobby Clarke forgot his name; he loves grilled cheese sandwiches (and bread, he fucking loves bread, it's good shit); he's French-Canadian (but I can't find a video of him speaking French WHY GOD WHY). Claude also looks adorable in hats (or like a frat boy, but that’s all hockey players, honestly), loves plaid suits, has a heart of gold, is willing to take one for the team, and gets into an average of one fight per season (because he usually goes to find the tiniest guy on the ice to take out his frustrations on because LOL Claude is also tiny), and definitely has a type of woman (small and dark-haired).
Also, he just got surgery on both his wrists (shirtless men, may or may not be SFW). I feel like fic is necessary here, because surely he needs some...help...with both wrists out of commission. Anyway, so he’s been on a post-surgery, post-season party circuit. How? He’s chilling at a bar, playing Baggo, and going to baseball games. #wildone #meiapproves
Okay, I'm going to cut myself off here and not link you to every video of every goal he's ever scored and every example of how great he is off the ice too. Just. BELIEVE IT. TRUST ME. (Although I agree with this article’s comments on why he shouldn’t be given the C just yet. He should be given the time and space to keep developing.)
&Danny Briere; (#48)
So Danny. Things to know about Danny: he’s French-Canadian, 34 years old, divorced father of three kids, tiny, used to play for the Phoenix Coyotes and Buffalo Sabres, likes to fist-pump when he scores a goal, is pretty much always classy (although sometimes feisty), and has beastly playoff stats (109 points in 108 playoff games - 50 goals and 59 assists, with 13 of those goals being game-winners) because he really likes to bring it for the playoffs.
(Ignore how the Flyers subsequently lost 4 in a row to the Devils... Ugh, fuck the Devils.)
He also won the All Star MVP in 2007 and played against G in the All Star 2011 game, whereupon they then posed for this schmoopy pic:
Danny’s kids (Caelan, Carson, and Cameron) are little carbon copies of himself:
They've been living together for only about five months, and the arrangement has worked better than anyone could have expected.
Briere's three children have become attached to Giroux. Very attached. Briere was asked the other day who was more excited to go to the All-Star Game, him or Giroux?
"Probably our boys," he said.
Our boys.
--source
♥ Danny primer with a lot more useful facts and adorable pics
He is basically tiny and clutch and made of delight.
&Scott Hartnell; (#19)
DROP IT LIKE IT’S SCOTT.
There are many reasons to love Scott Hartnell but my favorites can pretty much all be encapsulated in this video:
The Hart Trick:
1. Falling down, obviously
2. Scoring a goal on a bad rebound you barely get
3. Getting in a fight and losing
You should also listen to the #hartnelldown song, which includes classic lines such as Ladies love the locks - I got the crazy waves / Played in the All Star Game / Thank you, Jonathan Toews.
Yeah, Hartsy was in the 2012 All Star Game because Tazer got injured.
Whereupon he promised he’d donate $1000 for every time he fell down. And so teammate Claude Giroux thought he’d help out.
He’s aggressive on the ice, willing to fight, but goddamn if he isn’t such a nice guy off it. To be able to take something like this and laugh at yourself? So great. To not only laugh at yourself but to turn it into a way to raise money for charity? Even better.
Hartnell also supports You Can Play:
"We live in a diverse world where if anyone sets their mind to do anything they can do it, no matter race or sexuality or anything. There's a lot of guys involved, which speaks well for the League. … It's pretty cool that everyone is on board." --Scott Hartnell, Unscripted
He’s also kind of an adorable troll (watch his stick behind G and Pierre McGuire):
So Hartsy is on a line with Giroux and Jagr (NOW I’M ON A LINE WITH CLAUDE GIROUX - HE PASSES TO ME ‘CAUSE I KNOW WHAT TO DO) and they’re great. He’s basically BFFs with Claude, too, which is great. He went through a bad divorce but seems pretty chill since then, hanging out with the other single guys on the Flyers team and occasionally with his nieces (Warning: adorable). Hartsy also waged a hilarious campaign against Geno to get on the cover of NHL 13 - he lost, but the vids are still hilarious. Oh, and sometimes he films stuff with his BlackBerry Players’ Playbook for NHL.
Watch the Flyers work out in the locker room (unf, Claude and trolling!Jags) or watch Hartsy call teammate Jody Shelley a Swedish meatball, or watch them visit Pittsburgh with a cabbie who hates them or just eat a lot of Philly cheesesteaks.
Oh! They also go shopping for beds together. Which leads me to...
&Brayden Schenn; (#10)
Schenner’s the younger brother of Luke Schenn who plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs. He’s Claude’s current roommate.
Basically, this is what you need to know about him:
Yes, that’s the push from Philly-Pens game on April 1 that led directly to a hit on Danny, which sparked the ridiculous line brawl (featuring screaming coaches) with a minute left in the game after Philly had come back from behind to score 5 unanswered goals and win the game.
And that’s Hartsy patting Schenner’s tummy, yessss.
No, you should also know he’s one of the Flyers various rookies (seven, I think?) this past season who really helped pull them through after Pronger was knocked out.
&Sean Couturier; (#14)
Things to know about Couturier: he’s a 19 year old missing teeth, he’s the current housemate of Danny Briere & kids after the Claude moved out, he does laundry (but possibly fails at it), he’s "shy and quiet", and he can shut down Geno Malkin on the ice.
In the Flyers’ opening playoff round against Pittsburgh, rookie center Sean Couturier drew the assignment of shutting down Evgeni Malkin, the NHL’s leading scorer. The end result? Malkin was held scoreless in two of the six games and seemed aggravated throughout, taking a series of dumb retaliatory penalties. --source
He also got a hat trick in the Pens-Flyers playoff series, same game Giroux did, so I figure there’s probably a mad rush by all future Flyers rookies to take that spare room in the Briere house. Guaranteed on-ice success?
&Jaromir Jagr; (#68)
I don’t know if I’m qualified to talk about Jaromir Jagr, to be honest, because he does have a "Hall of Fame career" as #hartnelldown song put it so aptly. Why don’t you just hang out on this stats page and see how often his name comes up.
To be fair, he was drafted in 1990 and he’s still playing, so he’s pretty much had time to rack up these impressive stats. The main thing to know is he did most of this with the Pittsburgh Penguins and when he was a free agent last summer he opted to sign with the Flyers instead of the Pens, which incensed all of Pittsburgh. So he’s basically greeted with boos, to which he usually answers with goals. So suck it.
His goal song is "Moves Like Jagger", of course, and he is hilarious in the locker room but also an incredible mentor. He also constantly inspires bouts of shameless fanboying from everyone he plays with, but particularly G.
During the Rangers-Flyers Winter Classic in January of this year, Mike Rupp scored a goal and mocked Jagr by doing the Jagr salute.
Hartnell: I got Girardi.
Giroux: Who’s got Boyle? [turns to JVR] You got Boyle?
JVR: You see what Rupp did?
Giroux: What he do?
JVR: He did the “Jags Salute,” that’s why we gotta respond.
Giroux: No he didn’t. Fuck off.
Giroux: [to Brian Byole] Hey, did Rupp do the “Jags Salute?”
Boyle: I thought it was pretty cool.
Giroux: How is that cool? That’s the second goal of his fucking career.
Hartnell: That’s fucking embarrassing is what it is.
Boyle: Shut up.
Giroux: The guy’s a fucking legend.
source (with video)
G IS OFFENDED YOU TRY TO MOCK A LEGEND, RUPPER. DON’T EVEN.
Jags is so great.
Sadly, Jagr’s a free agent again this summer, so my awesome Hartnell-Giroux-Jagr line doesn’t look like it’s getting a second season.
&Max Talbot; (#27)
So Maxi Talbot used to be a Penguin. In fact, he’s in the 24/7 Penguins-Capitals Road to the Winter Classic as well as the 24/7 Rangers-Flyers one. Both teams were good to him, though, and he acknowledged that.
Let’s gloss over the bitterness from Pens fans and focus on the good: when he returned to Pittsburgh for his first game as a Flyer in December 2011, Pittsburgh took a moment to thank him and welcome him back. I may or may not have teared up at the video, which I can’t find online so you should just watch 24/7 for it!
He scored the Stanley Cup winner for the Pens in 2009 so they’re kind of hard pressed to hate him. That said, he went on to punctuate the Flyers defeat of the Pens with an empty netter, putting Philly up 4-2 at the end.
Still, he’s still friends with tons of Pens as well as Flyers, so haters can hate. Max Talbot does what he wants.
Anyway, so he’s hilarious with both teams and probably a terrible human being.
&Co.;
I am...running out of steam, so very quickly, a bunch of other players!
Wayne Simmonds (#17) - One of the smiliest guys on the team off the ice, aggressive and prone to fighting on the ice. One of only 20-some black players in the NHL, he was traded to the Flyers with Schenn in place of Mike Richards and Jeff Carter. (He is
thyme_hawthorne’s favorite.) Bam.James van Riensdyk (#2) - You Can Play supporter.
Kimmo Timonen (#44) - HE HAS NO HEAD. He’s an A along with Danny and Claude and adorable papa. He also keeps his cool.
"In 12 years, I’ve never seen that guy with a heartbeat over 140," Hartnell said, grinning. "And the guy is over there scrapping with a tough guy like Letang. It’s great to see. Guys are being called out there and sticking up for each other." --Scott Hartnell on long time friend and teammate, Kimmo Timonen
Chris Pronger (#20) - The Flyers’ C, he was sidelined after a concussion in late October. His season was deemed over after he continued suffering post-concussion syndrome, and there’s speculation his career may be over as well (he is 37). It’s super sad.
But this picture is delightful! Pronger, who is 6'6" and Danny, who is...5'10" on a good day.
&Ilya Bryzgalov; (#30)
DO NOT THINK I’VE FORGOTTEN BRYZ. I deliberately left him for last because he’s another one who inspires feelings in me, oh my god he’s so great. It’s not just for his ridiculously entertaining quotes or the fact that he’s gotten slammed so hard by the media and some fickle fans, but it’s also the way he manages to keep things in perspective even when things suck. He’s able to laugh at himself even when he’s frustrated and he keeps things in perspective.
So Bryz is the Flyers' goalie. He had a really expensive contract. He's been inconsistent in goal which has made people trash-talk him. All that aside, he gives great interviews:
The universe is HUMANGOUS BIG.
Goalies get pads; defensemen are the crazy ones.
He wears terrible shirts:
And does a great bobblehead impression:
And oh god his children are the cutest ever. He as a girl, Valery, and a boy, Vladislav. From 24/7 Rangers-Flyers:
Vladislav: I - I’m more Englisher and you’re more Russianer!
Valery: *eyeroll of all beleaguered older sisters* Can you stop it?
♥ I love this Bryz primer
I also have thoughts on his inconsistency and the constant scrutiny and naysaying, but this primer needs to stop. Almost done!
&Laviolette;
These are the highlights of Peter Laviolette, head coach for the Flyers:
He was the head coach for the Carolina Hurricanes when they won the Stanley Cup in 2006. GAH.
He wants the Flyers to play with some jam.
PUT SOME JAM ON IT.
He also tends to go from zen to screaming and starting shit with refs/the other team’s coach/the other team’s players. He’s got a lot of feelings, okay?! Oh Lavi, he’s so great. I pretty much adore him.
&Team;
IN CONCLUSION
♥ you should watch the HBO 24/7 Rangers-Flyers Road to the Winter Classic (episode 1 here and I’d be happy to provide torrents for the rest) (the Rangers are also really cute, except then every time they played the Flyers I’d end up wishing them dead, so it was a mixed bag on getting me to like them)
♥ this remains the best anthem ever
♥ I love this stupid team and I know it’ll be changing because teams always change but still #orangenation #flylikeag6
♥ you should also love
This post made possible with the enthusiastic cheerleading and link-finding of
celerywench and the love of 2naonh3_cl2 who started it all. ♥![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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