meitachi | the writing woes of porn

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the writing woes of porn

So I’m writing a Donghae hetsex fic because, I don’t know, this urge struck me out of nowhere. It is turning out a lot more epic and a lot slower than I’d originally anticipated.

→At lunch, fic status was thus: 2000+ words of foreplay and no actual sex! Of the five sections planned for Donghae's hetsex fic, I'm at 1.5. Nice. Apparently Donghae sleeping with girls is going to be long, elaborate, and filthily detailed.

→ A few hours later:

happy together ♪: *rolls* oh god donghae, TAKE OFF HER SHIRT.
lee sungmin: LOL
happy together ♪: seeeeriously why are they going so slooooow?! *mopes*
happy together ♪: donghae the gentleman. *grumps*
lee sungmin: this is what you get for writing him cute.
lee sungmin: you should have just stuck to hot and made him a man whore
happy together ♪: he should be more of a slut, trufax. lol.
lee sungmin: you'd be finished already.
happy together ♪: lol HE'D be finished already.
happy together ♪: 5x over.
lee sungmin: somewhere, Donghae is cursing your inability to just make him a slut.
happy together ♪: :'(
happy together ♪: donghae and his blue balls.
lee sungmin: lmfao

black_goose is clearly unsympathetic. :(

→ A little later, chatting with

papered:

e ♥ 규觅: :3 so has donghae moved past the clothing removal yet
happy together ♪: hahah uhh...well i'm on section 3 now and. well.
e ♥ 규觅: ah. loling
happy together ♪: she's topless at least? and he got under her skirt.
happy together ♪: working on the rest of the clothing this section.
e ♥ 규觅: (Y)
e ♥ 규觅: sobbing donghae
happy together ♪: hahah, too much of a gentleman. going soooo slow.
happy together ♪: i was talking to goose and she's like "now if this were kibum..."
e ♥ 규觅: LMFAO
e ♥ 규觅: (Y)
happy together ♪: and i'm like "sigh, yes, they'd be on round 2 already"
happy together ♪: it's tragic

→ NOW: Donghae has finally gotten the girl naked, thank god. What's he doing, go around being gentlemanly and sweet? He should just rip off her clothes with his teeth, y/y? But, oh no, wait! A snag:

happy together ♪: now they're definitely naked :Db
e ♥ 규觅: :3
happy together ♪: wait he might still have his boxers/briefs on, dammit.
e ♥ 규觅: LOLING
e ♥ 규觅: QUICK, GET RID OF THEM!
happy together ♪: ...but first i must specify they are black boxer-briefs and mm mm good!
e ♥ 규觅: APPROVES

I blame

halcyon_morn entirely for the delicious image of Donghae in nothing but black boxer-briefs and a silver cross necklace. I will never get it out of my head. :9 I don't think I'm troubled by this.

SO IN CONCLUSION: writing het sex is hard when girls, for some inexplicable reason, don't want to take their clothes off around Donghae. Crazy. Anyway, dinner break now, so Donghae's epic quest to get naked and have het sex must wait a little longer.

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I do not understand this concept of girls not wanting to take their clothing off around donghae, someone explain this to me.

Clearly the girls I chose to write Donghae with are too awed and bewildered by his extreme hotness to properly get to taking off their clothes. That's my theory anyway.

My clothes would be off faster than the fastest thing in existence if I were around Donghae.

I KNOW, RIGHT?

this makes me laugh considering

considering WHAT you bitch! >:(

THE CONTENT OF YOUR STORY WHORE >:(

THAT'S IT, I'M NINJAING YOUR CAMEO OUT >:O!!

THAT ICON WILL NEVER NOT BE FUNNY :(((((

ALSO DO THAT AND DIE >:[

YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST WROTE HIM RIPPING HER CLOTHES OFF WITH HIS TEETH.

M-maybe she will rip off his clothes with her teeth? T___T He still has boxers left to go, after all!

To be fair, I would.

aaaand...so would she!

Why not just have them start in media res? For example:

DONGHAE LOOKED AT THE GIRL. THE GIRL LOOKED AT DONGHAE. FOR SOME INEXPLICABLE REASON (or perhaps because the cosmos willed it) THEY WERE QUITE IN THE NUDE. AND THEN THEY HAD SEXYTIMES.

What I really mean to say though, is, AT LEAST YOU'RE WRITING FIC. D: I haven't been able to even despite wanting to.

Hahahaha your example reminds me of that fic Clarice wrote. Very nice.

It's okay, they're more or less naked now! I just have to get on describing the rest of it which, seeing as how this fic has gone so far, will take another lifetime. Wtf.

THAT'S TRUE YOU HAVE NOT WRITTEN IN A LONG TIME. Time to rectify that! Um. Kink meme? Request prompts? Idk. Whatever inspires you.

Why am I amused that this is your fic yet it doesn't seem to work out the way you want it to? :DDD

Hahaha - well it's more or less going the way I planned. Just...a lot slower.

LOL Why does that image seem to haunt people so? I mean, yes, I enjoy it, but I never thought it would become this...thing. XD

Anyway, hope the sex is going well! :D

ALSO WHO IS THE GIRL? :D

YOU WILL HAVE TO JUST WAIT AND SEE. >:D

B-because it's unbearably hot, Chris. ;____; Don't deny us Donghae fangirls our fantasy fodder!

aslkdjf ugh just got back and sex is...well. Long. orz I swear it doesn't take this long irl, lol.

LOL ILU ♥

And Donghae, why so fail? Is it because you're not with Kibum? XDDD

...that's probably why, LOL.

*squirms* Hetfic... idk, pussies just really squick me for some reason. Can't even really look at my own. XD;

Best of luck, though! \o/

This was the case for me for a long time! Many years as a slash fangirl and het fic actually squicked me out aksjfld. Somehow I got over it; not sure what happened but now I'm just...:D It's all hot. It's all porn! Guy/girl, guy/guy, girl/girl, whatever!

Possibly I just got more shameless, haha.

I'm pretty sure that in real life, if any girl was near Donghae enough for there to even be a possibility of anything sexual, her clothing would literally melt off.

LOL Thea.

I laugh yet I agree 100%.

...

I don't even need to read web comics for my daily dose of the funnies anymore.

You know I live to entertain you, Mishy! :D

What nobler purpose could there be? |D

now im blaming you for the oh so delicious image of hae only in black boxer-breifs and a silver cross necklace.. perfect for sweet dreams XD now tell me where i can read this fic ^^

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