I need this in my life RIGHT NOW

Canes have no chance at making the playoffs, but I was still squeaking in glee when they shut out the Blues last night. HA, TAKE THAT ST. LOUIS. Were you even good when I was there? Don't be good now; you're not my team. Cam Ward was amaaaaaaaazing and bb!Jeff scored and I thought I had everything I wanted in life to make me happy, until I had this conversation:

meiface: Why is there not bodyswap in this fandom already? And somehow, I'm sure someone can figure it out, PRETEND BOYFRIENDS.

nicolasechs: OH OH Jeff Skinner is getting tired of his mom trying to set him up with a nice girl, so when she visits him in Raleigh and gets the wrong idea about Eric and him, he doesn't bother correcting her. And then he has to talk his captain into going along with the charade and Eric puts up a very weak protest while guiltily loving all the Jeff snuggles ever. Cue Jeff realizing that maybe his crush on Eric is more than that. Then there are misunderstandings and declarations of love and SO MUCH SEX. The end.

YOU GUYS.

YOU GUYS.

Introducing Clark Kane/Superkaner. Superpower: shufflin.

This is the greatest video in the world.

My favorite part is how Tazer's says, dead seriously the way he does, "It's a nice shirt, it looks good on him," and everyone else is like, "No, god, that's a terrible shirt."

TAZER, YOU HAVE NO TASTE. THAT EXPLAINS SO MUCH.

Kaner, for example. I mean, seriously, Tazer is the Most Judgmental. Here he is judging New Yorkers for eating hot dogs (and then running away from pigeons), and when asked if he has any NHL superstitions, he's all, hell no, because they're STUPID. Kaner is like this glaring exception of terrible life choices that Tazer seems unable to see properly. Or maybe he does see all of Kaner's failings, mocks him for them, but is stupidly in love with him anyway because he has no taste.

Tazer, do you judge yourself a little bit? I figure he totally does but he can't help it anyway.

Sharpy's "oh my god" is also pretty glorious as is Soupy being totally dazed with horror. Ugh, I'm sad I got into the Hawks after he left - from all the interviews (especially with Joey the Junior Reporter), he seems like a really great guy and hilarious too.

Whatever. Haters gonna hate but Kaner's gonna just keep shufflin'.

( Other thoughts I have on Mr. Toes and Kaner. )

And then I had another conversation with forochel where I observed that Tazer calls everyone "buddy" all the time and she speculated that he made a special effort to call Kaner "buddy" because otherwise he'd slip up and call him "babe".

( And that spawned a game of drunken gay chicken. Naturally. )

We all dream of the day where we can write actual fic instead of just spinning gleeful scenarios in comments and chat.

BUT YAY UNC WIN, YAY DUKE LOSS, YAY HAWKS WIN. It's been a good sports day. ♥